Free Range Parenting, or not, as the case may be...

So last week a teacher friend expressed her frustration that parents of a high schooler didn't want the student to read some books in the grade level curriculum because of the adult themes in them.  I've always subscribed to the "let them read whatever" philosophy, but this situation frustrated me because so many people were so judgemental of the parents.

The parents in this case are actually grandparents who are very conservative and have strong Christian beliefs.  I agree that they can't protect him forever, and if I had been directly involved in the conversation, might have even "sided" with the other teacher.  I probably would have given some reasons why the materials were chosen and why it might be ok, with guidance, for the student to read them.  However,  I am disappointed that so many adults were ready and willing to "jump in" and automatically side with the teacher rather than the parents. Not one person involved in the conversation said, "Hey, we should find out more about this"or "maybe the parents have a point and we should find something different"....

Situations like this always make me analyze my own curriculum choices as well as how I interact with parents and other teachers.  As teachers we do have a responsibility to expand students' horizons...but we also have a responsibility to respect their beliefs and their parents beliefs.  We are given so much responsibility for students during the school day that we sometimes forget we are not their parents....that we don't get to make decisions about what is right for each kid, just like we don't want our kids' teachers to make decisions without our input. We, as parents and teachers, don't always agree, but we owe it to each other and to the kids to respect each other's beliefs and have responsible, polite conversations with the goal of doing what is best for kids.  And as bystanders, we have an obligation to remind each other to be patient and listen to each other.