Long distance friendships

I was born in a small town in Michigan where my dad was a pastor.  When I was three, in 1974, we moved to Flora, Indiana, where my folks lived until 1996.  I attended Flora Elementary school and Carroll Junior/Senior High School with pretty much the same kids for grades K-12.  A few moved in, a few moved out, two other elementary schools in the county closed and consolidated with us (one in 1st or 2nd grade and one in 3rd or 4th), but other than that, we were a pretty consistent group.  When I went to college, I moved a whole 27.3 miles (37 minutes, according to Google Maps), attending school and becoming friends with lots of folks who came from or stayed in the Midwest after we graduated.  After moving to Colorado in 1996, I had several bouts of homesickness and it took me quite a while to feel that Colorado was home.  (But that is a post for another time.)  Parts of both my parents families and my father-in-law's families live in the Midwest as well--a lot of our roots seem to be there.

Over the years, we've enjoyed playing host to friends who travel out here for business or pleasure--one memorable night in our second apartment I was in my jammies when one of IM's college roommates surprised us by knocking on the door to say he was in town.  We started calling our townhouse the urban ranch, because, between the pets, and the visitors, we started feeling like we had a dude ranch at times. (We always enjoyed it though!)

I've been very blessed to be able to get back to the Midwest every other year or so, sometimes two years in a row (even three) sometimes missing two or three years.  I flew back at least once before the kids were born and stayed with my brother, who was living in Chicago at the time.  I remember borrowing his car for a jaunt to Indiana to see some friends.  A couple times my folks picked up The Girl and I and we drove east with them, and at least three times now the kids and I have made the journey "on our own".

Every time  we go I have the same "problems" though...who do we tell we are coming, who do we make plans to see, and how do we explain to the folks we can't see why we can't see them?  I've joked that "one of these years" I'm going to set up shop somewhere and tell people to come to me, rather than trying to surf from couch to couch and hotel to hotel.  One year, my friend, J, hosted a party at her house, where my kids got to play with our college roommates' kids and we were able to see and hang out with several people at once--that was nice!  This year I wasn't able to see one of my good college friends because of schedule conflicts...it was a hard decision to not cancel other plans...but who would I miss then?  Other friends we just didn't tell we were going to be in the area (sorry), apologizing after we left, because we knew we'd have to give up a visits with family members to see friends.   My friend, A, suggested that we do what she used to...just don't tell anyone we are coming and surprise the people we want to see.  Hmm...tempting...

What always amazes me, and it shouldn't, is how my friends and I are able to pick up almost where we left off, despite not having spent time together for 1-2-3 or more years.  Of course, we've sent letters, emails, made phone calls, and followed each other on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest...but if you've ever spent a long time away from a good friend you know that those are all poor substitutes for sitting on the couch (or the floor, or a park bench, or a hotel bed) and knowing with just one look that something is hilariously funny or reminds you of "that one time, in 8th grade", "or when we had a social with that house..", ..or, well, just knowing what the other person is thinking.  I'm so thankful to have friends that we can do this every time! We mystify our spouses and children with inside jokes, stories, and memories and the time is always too short.

I've been thinking a lot lately, though, about how for most of my friends our time now is too short, but we will have an eternity together... what better way to spend eternity, than worshiping with friends and relatives  from all the stages of my life? During our trips (and before and after) that "Friends are Friends Forever, if the Lord's the Lord of them..." song runs through my head almost constantly (pass the tissues, please)...So if you are one of the folks that we missed (or even that we saw), just keep singing with me...we will have more time, some day!